She hadn’t trusted her daughters and wasn’t keen on medications in general. She had tried to hide how unwell she was. They had wanted to help her but she had felt so unwell that she couldn’t accept their help. Everything had hurt, her head, her skin, even her hair. Nausea was her constant companion, and vomiting was the guest who kept overstaying their welcome. She didn’t want to go to the hospital, she said she would give hospice a go.

“I feel heaps better today.”

“What’s going on?”

“My pain is gone, I don’t feel sick anymore since the elderly doctor started the medicines yesterday.”

“That’s good. Did you have some breakfast?”

“Yeah, I had some porridge, but they didn’t cook it the way I like it. There was brown sugar but it wasn’t quite right.”

“You managed to keep it down.”

“Yeah, first time in a while.”

“Good. What do you think is going on? What did your doctors tell you?”

“I like my cancer doctor, he’s a Pakeha but married to a Māori. He told me like it was.”

“Straight up?”

“Yeah, none of that bullshit the others had used. He was honest, and let me know what was going on.”

“You’re not going to get any bullshit here. What did he say?”

“The cancer has spread from my lungs, has gone to my head. There aren’t any treatments left for me.”

“What do you think has been going on lately to make you feel so bad?”

“Probably the cancer getting worse.”

“Yeah, I think the cancer in the brain has grown bigger. It’s giving you headaches, making you feel sick and vomit. Has your thinking been not so clear?”

“Yeah, it hasn’t been right since the radiotherapy and the chemo. If anyone asked me if they should have the treatment for cancer, I’d tell them not to.”

“It hasn’t helped?”

“No, I feel so much worse.”

“You gave it a go. I need to check with you about what you want. There’s a treatment that might help you, but it probably would only work for a short time. You could either try it or not. It’s up to you and the whānau.”

“Hmm, I’m not sure. What do my children think?”

“We want you to try mum.”

“Okay, I’ll try it. Thanks for being honest with me.”

“No worries. We’ll give it a good go, and see what happens. E noho ra.”

“See you later Doc.”